"Bright" Review: The Rumors Are True
By this time, you’ve unwrapped your gifts, dealt with a little family love and drama, and might be getting in a little work before the New Year break. So why not escape from reality for a couple hours with director David Ayer’s Bright? Let’s just say that’s not a bright idea. Yeah, because the film is about as corny as that last pun.
Will Smith is Daryl Ward, a veteran cop who is getting back out on the street with his orc partner, Nick Jakoby (Joel Edgerton), after being shot by a criminal. It’s bad enough that orcs are considered scum in this world of humans, elves, and fairies, but diversity hire Jakoby is a part of the reason Ward was shot. So Jakoby is hated by virtually everyone in his life and his own kind. When a routine response uncovers a magic wand at the residence, the two partners are the most sought after cops in...can we call it Middle-earth for kicks? Everyone wants the wand because whoever wields it can be granted whatever they wish for. The problem is, only a Bright can hold it and live.
Thus, a survive the night film of sorts kicks off. Not the kind that Ayers is good for, but the kind of buddy-cop drama that just doesn’t work, reminiscent of the films that came out post Lethal Weapon. While the world building in the film is decent, you constantly feel like something isn’t quite right. You’re waiting for a punch line that’s never revealed. Maybe that’s the problem; the film takes itself seriously. With elves that do acrobatic martial arts moves and don’t miss when it comes to taking a shot, in the midst of a barrage of bullets that miss, it’s hard to believe. It’s also hard to believe there’s no racist themes underlying the film. With the orcs as baggy clothe wearing gangsters living in the slums, the elite elves wearing the latest high-fashion clothes and living in a gentrified area, and humans fitting somewhere in between, the “races” lean into stereotypes. It’s certainly not the District 9 environment it strives to be.
When news hit that superstar Will Smith would be starring in a Netflix film, a sense of excitement hit blogs and media outlets. Seeing Smith in Bright is the equivalent of the time that you beat your dad in a race for the third time. You knew he hadn’t been winning for a while, and you thought maybe it was a fluke. This film cements Will’s range and the fact that his delivery is still stuck in the Bad Boys 2 era. Edgerton is wasted, but it’s probably a good thing that you can’t recognize him in all his orc make-up. Genius decision! Noomi Rapace adds a small spark of excitement as Leilah, the big baddy hunting down her wand.
At the end of the day, in order to bake a good cake, you take different ingredients and bring them together. Generally, they’re brought together with one or two key ingredients that can gel them all and poof! Deliciousness! Bright has all the right ingredients, but it’s lacking the jell to bring them together. Ayer is known for his signature style in the cop genre. He wrote Training Day! He wrote/directed End of Watch (a film I enjoyed)! He has skills. Ayer teamed with his longtime cinematographer, Roman Vasyanov, so the film’s look is definitely there. The cast on paper is a solid ensemble. Taking Ayer’s style and infusing it into a fantasy world could work had Max Landis’ script not been so disjointed.
There’s a reason Bright is getting a lot of buzz for being bad. It’s bad! Yet, the word of mouth that has drawn in 11 million viewers in the first three days maybe the kind of thing that years from now makes it a cult classic. Perhaps that’s why you checked out this review. Perhaps that’s while you’ll check it out yourself. Just don’t say you weren’t warned.
Rating: D
"London Has Fallen" Review
You go to see London Has Fallen in the theater for two simple reasons: destruction and survival. How is London going to be destroyed? What does that look like on the big screen? Will our heroes survive, and if so, how? Outside of that, why else would you see a film that’s been done before but with different characters? Let’s talk about it.
In the sequel to Olympus Has Fallen, Gerard Butler is back as Mike Banning, a secret service agent assigned to President Benjamin Asher (Aaron Eckhart). After the funeral of the British Prime Minister brings the world’s leaders to London, a massive strike against them all takes everyone out, accept the president of the United States. With a target on the president’s head, terrorist Aamir Barkawi (Alon Aboutboul) and his son Kamran (Waleed Zuaiter) send all of their goons after Banning and Asher to insure their vengeance on behalf of their dead loved one is carried out.
So now you know the plot of the film. As far as the destruction of buildings, guns and weapons, it all looks good and sounds even better. London is really just a survive the night film, set predominately during the day. It has everything you need to get sucked in and believe the locations, weapons and technology.
What you won’t believe is that Banning is the only person in this cinematic world who can shoot and hit their target every time while managing to dodge every bullet and RGP sent his way. You won’t believe that the world leaders are always a couple steps behind Banning’s intellect, and have no clue what’s going on most of the film. Even President Asher seems more like a boy following his father for protection. You would think he learned how to hold a gun and fight since the last incident. As long as you suspend your disbelief for the film’s 99 minute run time, you’ll enjoy this bullet ridden, action thriller!
London Has Fallen looks like a flawless game of Call of Duty! Seriously, there is an awesome one take in which Banning and British Forces push down a street corridor guns blazing. It’s beautifully shot and executed, and would likely be where Call of Duty gets inspiration from when they turn the game into a feature film. Or maybe it was the reverse? I have to give it up for the banter in the film. Butler and Eckhart sell the Die Hard reminiscent lines and create nice buddy action chemistry on screen.
Save your money, and watch the film when it comes on Netflix. If you like action films where the main character’s bullets don’t miss and they pop off witty one liners, then this one is for you! The only question is, which city will this franchise destroy next?
Rating: C-
"San Andreas" Review: Shout out to the 90's
Writer Carlton Cuse (Lost, Bates Motel) must be fond of 90’s action movies, because his newly penned “San Andreas” plays like an action blockbuster from that decade but set in 2015. Whether that’s a good thing or not depends on the viewer’s taste. Filled with suspense, action and drama, “San Andreas” falls through the cracks of being a great disaster film and lands in an awesomely bad popcorn movie!
Ray (Dwayne Johnson) is an LA police and fire rescue helicopter pilot. He’s just been served divorce papers from his wife Emma (Carla Cugino), and learned that she and their daughter Blake (Alexandra Daddario) are moving in with Emma’s new boyfriend (Ioan Gruffudd). Before he can deal with his feelings, he has to deal with the earthquake that just hit Nevada.
Lawrence (Paul Giamatti) is a seismology professor at Cal Tech who just happened to come up with a method that predicts Earthquakes. He warns the nation that there will be another massive quake to hit the San Andreas fault. With a helicopter in his possession and his estranged wife and daughter in danger, Ray goes after them.
The film plays out almost beat for beat as 90’s movies like “Cliffhanger” or “Independence Day”. There is a heart pounding, unbelievable (and I mean unbelievable) rescue in the beginning of the film. Then we get a splash of character development and background on our main characters, while simultaneously getting exposition from the “crazy earthquake soothsayer”. If you can get past the on-the-nose dialogue, corny one-liners, and one in a million death defying stunts, then you will be thoroughly entertained!
The truth of the matter is this is one of the most unapologetic, self-centered disaster films I’ve seen in a while. In “San Andreas” we have a rescue pilot that uses his position and skills to try and solely save his family. It’s so wrong, but at the same time perhaps so right. If one of the biggest earthquakes on record hit, the first thing I would do is try to save my family. Thus the film becomes a romantic comedy at times as Ray and Emma unite to try and save Blake. Lines like “Let’s go get our daughter.” become a punch line rather than a war cry.
“San Andreas” is a popcorn blockbuster that will likely get swept out of the box office after a good three to four week run. It’s a film that you’ll sit down to watch when it comes on TBS for the thirtieth time. If you’re looking for entertainment and humor in a movie that doesn’t quite realize it’s funny (or maybe it does), “San Andreas” is for you!
Rating: C-